August 31, 2020 (Mawmaw's birthday, I hope you visited with her) Dear Darkened Rose, I remember on one of my first appointments with Madeline Alford she asked me a version of an age-old counselor's question— When can you last remember being effortlessly happy? Considering at that time I would have been an early teenager, I… Read More "3.6 – When was the last time you were happy?"
May 20, 2020 Dear Darkened Rose, I'm in a constant state of feeling as though I could use just a bit more sleep. This year, the amount of time I have spent up at work has increased which is quite opposite of what I had hoped for during these months. I had been looking forward… Read More "2.5 – Zoom Out of Time"
January 19, 2020 Dear Darkened Rose, Now more than ever, I feel as though I am the most healthily aware version of myself as I have ever been. While I may not yet be at the peak of having met my strongest state of mental health, I can see that I am watching myself climb… Read More "3.5 – The children’s book"
September 13, 2019 Dear Darkened Rose, I still have some unpacking to do. Laundry has long been unloaded and is now in regular cleaning cycles. Although, my brain—on the other hand—has not had the same luxury as my laundry. Searching for my newly reclaimed routine has taken a bit longer than I would have liked.… Read More "4.7 – It’ll rain a sunny day"
May 12, 2019 Dear Darkened Rose, Happy Mother's Day, you beautiful woman! I am here writing to you when I probably shouldn't be. I most certainly should be focusing my attention on schoolwork until Wednesday, but I have just really felt that I needed to open this window today. So let's chat. A while back,… Read More "3.4 – What would I do if I had another moment with you?"
February 27, 2019 Dear Darkened Rose, HAPPY BIRTHDAY, WOMAN!!!!!!!!! The other morning, as I got in the shower, this fear washed over me—"How possible is it that I will die today?!?" To say the least, my id mind can be such a drama queen. I think it's worth mentioning, though, that I can very distinctly… Read More "3.3 – Did You Stop Fearing Death?"
Dear Darkened Rose, I have missed you quietly and gently this past year. Lately, I have been consumed with trying to figure out how to “critically think” like a properly cultured human. I try finding conversations for gaining and sharing ideas. Usually, in failing to have done the latter, I purge with word vomiting sessions. […]
July 12, 2017 Dear Darkened Rose, You often mentioned your wish to donate your body to science, and I was always so proud of you for wanting that. It turns out, you never made plans for it. In our welter of grief, we did what was easiest for us when nothing was clarified in writing. I… Read More "3.1 – What Are You Doing With Your Body?"